Nothing Gold

Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay. -Robert Frost

My Photo
Location: Arlington, Virginia, United States

I am a white American middle class suburban housewife trying desperately to tell herself that that is not who she is. One time I was a glowing young ruffian. Oh my God it was a million years ago.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

A Better Survey

1. What is worse: Going to your favorite restaurant, ordering your favorite steak only underneath the steak is a scabby band-aid. Or?

Yeah, yeah, So I Married and Axe Murderer is cool, I get it.

2. Do you like me?


3. What percent of all paper clips that you come in contact with do you unfold?

Hmm, maybe 10 or so.

4. What are your five favorite movies? (Legally Blonde does not count)

Il Ladro di Bambini.
What Women Want.
Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion.
Guys and Dolls.
Silence of the Lambs. (But don't make me watch it right now)

5. Have you ever left a pair of underwear in the forest?


6. If zombies were real, would you be afraid of them?

I'm already afraid of them.

7. How many Cold Cut Combos could you eat in a day?

Probably just 1 or 2. Or less, depending on how many days in a row it was.

8. How many times have you lost your keys in an article of clothing you are wearing?

Hmm, I don't remember doing that, but that doesn't mean I haven't, many times.

9. Do you like almonds?

Yes, but not almond flavoring.

10. Does God exist?


11. Is there something better than pie?


12. What were/are the economic, social, and political consequences of Marbury vs. Madison?

Something about judicial review.

13. Age?


14. Sex?


15. Location?

Washington DC.

16. In your opinion, is there always room for one more?


17. What do you need more of?

Hmm, right now floss and overnight diapers.

18. How do you feel when you are stuck in traffic and a motorcycle drives by between the lanes?

It used to bother me and then I realized I was really just jealous and I let it go.

19. Do you want a Cadillac Escalade?

Hell, no!

20. What are your feelings regarding 25cent hot dog night?

Hell, yes!

21. How often do you take public transportation?

Once per month or so. Sometimes a lot more.

22. When you were 16 did you find Monty Python hilarious? Do you find them hilarious now?

Yes, and not as much anymore.

23. Which is scarier: 1) As you are being put under anesthesia for a big, hairy operation, you find out that Mo, Larry, and Curly are assisting -or- 2) You are locked in a room and are forced to watch an endless loop of the same episode of Gilligan's Island

Am I locked in without my 3 year old? Can I take a nap on the floor? Awesome, I choose that one!

24. What is the biggest risk you are facing at this very moment?

My back starting to hurt from sitting in front of the computer. (or scarier, I risk not paying my son enough attention while I fill out this survey.)

25. Can you ever have too much money?

Probably, yes, but hopefully I would have the self-awareness to give it all away then.

26. Black and Blue or Black and Tan?

Black and Tan.

27. Have you ever kissed a boy on the lips?


28. Have you ever kissed a girl on the lips?

Does my mom count?

29. If they made the movie of your life, what would the title of the movie be?

Probably something cheesy I didn't choose. For marketing purposes.

30. How many camels fit on the head of a pin?


31. Who do you like better ... Ben or Jerry?

They are both awesome.

32. How many chapters will your book have?

A book I write? Probaly just a few and it would never get finished.

33. What is your favorite color?


34. What is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Yeah, yeah, The Holy Grail is cool, I get it.

35. How long do you have to drive continually before you start going insane?

Not long. A couple of hours. But it depends on whether a child is screaming in the back seat.

36. Boxers or Briefs?

For men? Boxers. Or boxer briefs.

37. What is the most important meal of the day?

I think dinner. It takes the most work, so if it isn't as important, what a waste.

38. Are you a Toys (backwards)R Us Kid?

You know, I was up until the point that my son got old enough to ask for things. Now that place is scarier than zombies.

39. snow skiing: a great sport, or the greatest sport?

I'd like to try it some day.

40. can you lick your elbow?


41. did you just try to lick your elbow or did you already know that it is physically impossible to do that?

Tried it.

42. Will you be in my punk band?


43. Even if my punk band is named POLE-DANCING HEMATOMA?


44. Is Crisco OK?


45. How many times per minute must you remind yourself, "I am not my job"?

A lot.

46. Is M. Night Shmalayan lame?

I guess that's what people are saying. I don't really keep up on these things. I would still be impressed if I saw him at a restaurant.

47. Were you hugged enough?


48. Are you hugged enough?




50. Why don't you own a gas mask? Seriously.

Are you trying to freak me out? It's working a little. Why do I live in this city anyway?

51. The Unitatis Redintegratio document of the Catholic Church's Second Vatican Council is desperately important because...

Something about Ecumenism.

52. Eminem or not?


53. If you're a white person, and you don't listen to much hip-hop, and yet you like the Beastie Boys, what the hell is wrong with you? Don't you realize that the Beastie Boys ARE ELVIS?

I don't really like the Beastie Boys. Sorry.

54. Are you trying to perfect as your Father in heaven is perfect? If not, whatever else could you possibly be doing with your life that is so important it could keep you from trying to be perfect as your Father is perfect?

Yes, trying but not doing all that well. Perhaps I should be trying harder.

55. How many minutes "ahead" or "behind" is your watch set for?

I don't know. I assume it's right on, but I don't think any of the clocks in my house say the same thing, and I don't know what the real time is.

56. Where have you been?


57. Name?


58. How far away from your home town do you live and how far away would you like to live?

I live all the way across the country. I would like to live across a mountain range.

59. In your opinion, is expensive champagne really better than cheap champagne?

Yes. I would say that $15 champagne is more that 3 times better than $5 champagne. Worth it. $100 champagne is maybe only 5-10 times better than $5 champage. Not worth it.

60. How sad would you be if you ran over a cat?

Probably pretty sad, but it would depend on who's cat it was and how sad he or she was.

61. If you were a parasite, would you rather spend your gestational stage in the innards of a cow or the innards of a caterpillar?

Probably caterpillar, there would be more movement and excitement.

62. How high does your volume knob go?

Not all that high.

63. Totally rad, totally rockin, or totally sick?

I don't think I really say any of those, unfortunately.

64. What do you know about the Hood of death from Psalm 23?

It's okay He's got my back or something like that.

65. Have you ever followed an exercise regimen to strengthen your core? (include responses to all five W's in your answer)

I'm sure I have and no, I don't want to answer in that form. Ha!

66. If the only kinds of candy left on the planet were m and ms (original), reeses pieces, and skittles, which variety would be most likely to survive the ensuing struggle for survival?

M and M's. Duh.

67. Top three power ballads?

Sweet Child O' Mine.
Um, that's the only one I can think of that I really like. Maybe November Rain or Lady? Silent Lucidity?

68. Explain the statement "God is good." Support your position.

Um, you're making me nervous. I don't like being put on the spot. God is good. I can't explain because it often makes no sense to me, but I believe it anyway.

69. You must be world champion at something. What is it?

Oh man, uh, pole vault?

70. What is the first pop, rock, or rap song you choreographed dance moves to? What was your signature move?

Move This by Technotronic. Or maybe Giving Him Something He Can Feel by En Vogue. I'm having trouble keeping the timeline straight. I don't remember any moves, but there's a video somewhere...

71. If you're in a relationship, and you and your significant other could redistribute your combined existing weight between the two of you (the girl could give 10 pounds to the guy, or vice versa, of any amount), what do you mutually decide to do?

Um Hubby says he'd take some. I'm cool with that. But maybe we should just be happy with our bodies the way they are and stop obsessing about weight, hmm?

72. House, or Gray's Anatomy?

I have never seen either. I am slightly ashamed and also slightly proud.

73. Antz, or A Bug's Life?

A Bug's Life.

74. Paris Hilton, or Nicole Richie?

Uh, I think you know.

75. Toward, or towards?

I think I like toward better but am more likely to say towards.

76. Loving and losing, or never loving at all?

I have to choose which I prefer? Loving and losing. But don't say that to me if it happens.

77. Coffee, or tea?

Right now? Tea.

78. Or me?


79. Why the hell do people ever waste money on weddings?

To celebrate and declare their love in front of their friends and party it up.


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